Charlie and the Alien or how to destroy your career..

The rest of the world has finally discovered the truth that actor Martin Sheen and his family have been hiding all of these years, son Charlie Sheen is a complete idiot. The sad part to this statement is Charlie’s mind was not really lost through many loosing battles with drugs and booze, but was melted long ago by the mind-melt-ray of an alien laser gun. The alien had been secretly hiding in the confines of a bottle of Jack Daniel’s and only getting out for occasional meeting with known Hollywood prostitutes until Charlie happened upon him one night in a lonely strip club. Charlie, at that time had a measurable IQ close to Albert Einstein and was on a fast track for leader of the free world until that little alien mind-ray zapped his mind. The world will never know what it lost because from that moment on Charlie’s mind became the consistency of melted strawberry ice cream.

The above statement makes as much sense as Charlie saying the 9/11 attacks were staged by the Bush administration. Don’t believe me? Type this into Google: “Charlie Sheen, 9/11” and read the hits. The moment he uttered those words of wisdom he became the immediate poster boy for the conspiracy groups running around screaming the sky is falling and Bush is to blame and it is all documented for you.

I must admit that I had not been aware of this until I surfed on over to A Soldier’s Perspective paged down and came across it. I read the comment and just sat there wondering what had happened to old Charlie. So bringing up trusty old Google I typed in, “Charlie Sheen, 9/11” and was lost no more. This explains why after two movies as his leading man Director Oliver Stone dropped Sheen like a hot potato. I had always assumed it was Charlie’s well-publicized drug habits and all night partying, but I had been wrong.

Now I understand why that beautiful ex-wife of his is just that, an ex. Poor Denise Richards, the mental nightmare she must have been through living with a total mush-brained dum-dum burned out from too many all night parties, drugs, booze and that dreaded space alien with the mind-melt-ray. What the hell is the matter with this guy?

I was a big fan of his show, Two and a half men, but I really don’t think my family will be watching it further. I would rather watch the sleeping habits of an ostrich then listen to him mutter through his lines anymore. Bye-bye Charlie. I hope I don’t meet that alien.